i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize