She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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