I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize