i jhust puked up my retainher.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
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