The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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