I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
If its not for food we ain't going out.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
