2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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