You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
