walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
