Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize