so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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