What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Randomize
