No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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