i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
there was a trapeze. enough said
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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