I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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