My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize