so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
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No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
True college students do jello shots in the library
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