she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Randomize