He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
