Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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