i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
