hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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