ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
