I want to walk on stilts...naked
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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