garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
