Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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