how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
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