I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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