I'm going to jail i love you
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Randomize
