If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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