how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Did you just see the Batmobile???
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
