its not stalking. its research.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
