from now on my penis is your penis
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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