apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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