You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
