There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
