haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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