I want you more than these girls want KFC
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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