How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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