I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize