That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Omg I joined a choir last night...
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
