So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize