Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(216): View more from Ohio

My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes

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(216): My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes http://tfl.nu/wpjq

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(540): View more from Virginia

Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed

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(540): Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed http://tfl.nu/7wu4

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(415): View more from California

I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota

(415): View more from California

everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy

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(415): I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota (415): everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy http://tfl.nu/10ak

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(972): View more from Texas

I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.

(1-972): View more from Texas

I want to be a cop.

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(972): I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party. (1-972): I want to be a cop. http://tfl.nu/ucz6

Replies (104) Good night (23415) Bad night (775)
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(970): View more from Colorado

Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.

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(970): Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends. http://tfl.nu/xm5k

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(607): View more from New York

I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.

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(607): I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better. http://tfl.nu/5tpe

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(616): View more from Michigan

You are an asshole

(574): View more from Indiana

haha sleeping beauty awakes.

(616): View more from Michigan

Where did you find this costume?

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(616): You are an asshole (574): haha sleeping beauty awakes. (616): Where did you find this costume? http://tfl.nu/m4ai

Replies (31) Good night (12243) Bad night (775)
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(417): View more from Missouri

Hookers taste better with whip cream

(816): View more from Missouri

Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too

(417): View more from Missouri

Fair enough

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(417): Hookers taste better with whip cream (816): Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too (417): Fair enough http://tfl.nu/svnz

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(910): View more from North Carolina

Just got walked in on during safety inspections

(828): View more from North Carolina

Think you passed?

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(910): Just got walked in on during safety inspections (828): Think you passed? http://tfl.nu/r9km

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(770): View more from Georgia

Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.

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(770): Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again. http://tfl.nu/e3vl

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(616): View more from Michigan

We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.

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(616): We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style. http://tfl.nu/liij

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(224): View more from Illinois

I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.

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(224): I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring. http://tfl.nu/u70q

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(201): View more from New Jersey

I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it

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(201): I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it http://tfl.nu/orze

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(240): View more from Maryland

I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.

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(240): I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber. http://tfl.nu/iuw9

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?

(978): View more from Massachusetts

I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it

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(774): Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down? (978): I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it http://tfl.nu/io4i

Replies (6) Good night (928) Bad night (227)

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