Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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