omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize