my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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