I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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