I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
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