Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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