The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
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