The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
