Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
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the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
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I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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