so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
So much rum. So many feels.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
