I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
